


When You Do Your Best for Love

by Old (idowritingnowiguess)



Category: Christian Bible, Original Work
Genre: Angel/Demon Relationship, Blasphemy, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Christmas Presents, F/M, Falling In Love, Feelings Realization, Fluff, Forbidden Love, LLF Comment Project, Light Angst, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Other, Religious Guilt, Romantic Fluff, Unresolved Romantic Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-21
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:01:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28215117
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idowritingnowiguess/pseuds/Old
Summary: “Well, I don’t celebrate Christmas, butyoudo.”A demon bears a gift. An angel has a revelation.
Relationships: Asmodeus/Samael, Original Angel Character/Original Demon Character, Original Character(s)/Original Character(s)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 2





	When You Do Your Best for Love

It is December 25th, approximately 9 PM, and I am alone in my room when I realize I have a missed call from Gabriel.

My heart sinks. He had asked me to come over for Christmas. I had told him I couldn't make it. I'd promised to call him instead. I should have set a reminder.

Scratch that. What I _should_ have done is actually gone over.

It’s not like it’s required or anything. Michael only makes it to half our Christmases, if that, and no one gives them shit about it. It’s just something we picked up from humans, like pronouns and sex and good food.

But Gabriel wanted to see me, and I said no. I can’t be bothered to return to my _camascheth_ for one day?

I properly realize, for the first time, that I haven't been home in a _year._

“Goddamnit,” I say, crumpling, and a mental alarm goes off— ** _zodameta a dooain c il Ascha g hoxmarch,_ ** **_לֹא תִשָּׂא אֶת-שֵׁם-ה' אֱלֹהֶיךָ, לַשָּׁוְא_** ** _, thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain—_ **[[1]](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28215117#_ftn1)

I wince. _Forgive me._

I seem to be asking that a lot lately.

Is there a cap on 1 John 1:9?[[2]](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28215117#_ftn2) Is it blasphemous to even wonder? I think that it is. The more I think, the more I drive myself in sinful circles.

Motherfucker, I—

_Knock, knock._

_Ugh._ I consider not answering—I don’t need this right now—but in the end, I sigh and get up to pull the door open. I automatically mumble a halfhearted greeting before I even register who it is.

“Hey,” they say, and I start to actually pay attention when I realize that it's Asmodeus. I don't know who I was expecting, but it wasn't her.

“Hello.”

We idle for a moment. “You gonna let me in?”

“Oh!” I step aside. “Yeah! Yeah, ‘course, I’m sorry.”

“You’re good,” she laughs, passing me and plopping down on my bed with that self-assured ease that I… envy. Ah, shit.

“Sam?”

_Focus._ “Sorry. I got distracted.”

“You don’t have to apologize. Are you feeling okay?”

“Uh, yeah.” I sit down next to her. “I just—I’ve got a lot on my mind.”

“Me too,” Asmodeus says, and for a second I spot an undercurrent of something that is deep, and sad, and very, very old. “Anyway!” She turns towards me, and it’s gone. “I gotcha this.” It takes me longer than it should to realize that she is holding out something flat, and square, and… gift-wrapped. “You know, for Christmas.”

“I… I’m sorry.” Shock and guilt are duking it out in my mind. “I didn’t get you anything.”

“Well, of course not,” she says dismissively. “I’m a demon, I don’t give a shit about Christmas.”

“But… then why…” I gesture vaguely at the gift.

“Well, I don’t celebrate Christmas, but _you_ do.”

“Sure, but…”

I can see the exact moment she softens around the edges. “I know that you’re sacrificing a lot to be here. You’re—” she cuts herself off. “You should have things that make you happy.”

My throat feels too tight to speak, so I just look down and fumble with the wrapping paper for longer than is necessary. I peel it back to reveal a book of short stories with a pink cover.

Asmodeus's voice cuts into my thoughts. “Um… sorry, it's not really… uh, it's not super thought-out or anything. Just picked it up while I was doing some business Up on Earth…”

She keeps talking; I smile as I watch her try to decry own kindness. She is so thoughtful and good.

_…That’s heresy, you realize,_ a voice in the back of my mind speaks up. _She’s a demon. You tie yourself in knots at the slightest hint of blasphemy, but outright, blatant heresy is cool?_

But I feel strangely calm, because it’s true. _Just look at her._ Maybe not Good, but good. Heresy is a sin, but so is lying.

I zone back in; she’s still rambling. I cut her off. “Still. You didn’t have to do this.”

“Oh, it’s, uh, it’s no biggie.”

“It is to me.” I lean forward into an awkward hug. “Thank you.”

She’s tense, and not reciprocating, and I regret this deeply. I’m just about to withdraw and apologize when I feel her relax, and her hands come down to rest on my back. “You’re welcome,” she says, so quietly I almost don't hear it.

I smile into her shoulder. _You should probably stop now,_ that voice says, and I let it know that I do not care. This is bliss, this curly hair pressed against my cheek; this skin that is soft and warm and carries the slight scent of smoke. I have never been here before, but all the same, I know it is home.

Do I imagine that she holds me a little tighter?

The thought comes as naturally as a human blinks or breathes:

_I love you._

Wait, **_what?_**

Asmodeus feels me go rigid, and immediately draws back. “Are you alright?” she says, looking almost as panicked as I feel. “Samael?”

“Yeah—no, uh—I’m good—sorry—I, uh, I’m good!” I stammer, sounding not at all good.

“Um, okay.” She seems about as freaked out as I would expect. She stands up. “Well, I guess I should head out…”

“Wait!” It comes out so much more desperate than I intended, which is to say, exactly as desperate as I feel. She turns back expectantly. “Um, I'm sorry.” I feel ridiculous. “You've—you don't have to stay.”

She frowns. “What were you going to say?”

The voice of reason is back for a third round. _Don’t you dare,_ it says, probably frustrated. _She’s given you an out. Let her leave._ _Do_ not _ask her to stay._

I avoid eye contact. “Christmas isn’t over for a few more hours… we could watch… some movies… or something.” She doesn’t respond, and I don’t look at her face. “I’m sorry, it was a dumb idea.”

“Nah.” Her voice is… soft? She sits back down, folding her legs under her. “Scoot over.”

“Am I being culturally insensitive or something?” She’s already gone out of her way; I don't want to make her regret it.

“Well,” Asmodeus says, leaning back, “We demons actually celebrate June 25th; the _furthest_ day from Christmas every year.”

“You… you do?”

“No.” She tosses her head back, laughing, and I can't help but smile too. “I’m just fucking with you.”

**Author's Note:**

> [ [1]](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28215117#_ftnref1) The second commandment. A crude Enochian translation—literally, "call forth the name of thy God in fear"— then the original Hebrew, then the accepted English.
> 
> [[2]](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28215117#_ftnref2) If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (KJ21.)
> 
> * * *
> 
> This is definitely not my best work. I wanted to get it out for the holiday season, so it's a bit rushed. There's a lot of skimming over stuff and telling rather than showing. I will probably come back and rework this at some point. But in the meantime, I do hope you enjoyed it anyway! 
> 
> Samael would actually be calling her "Abyzou" at this point, because she's working under an alias, but whatever. Tagged both F/M and Other because they're both older than gender, but it's not addressed. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ I'd like to give my thanks to [BibleGateway](https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1+John+1%3A9&version=KJ21) and [LingoJam](https://lingojam.com/APassableEnochianTranslator), and my lukewarm regards to ~7 years of Catholic upbringing. Title from The Muppet Christmas Carol, because that shit's dope. You can come tell me I'm cringe [here](https://unreasonable-keysmash.tumblr.com/).
> 
> **Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays, everyone! :D**
> 
> * * *
> 
> This story is part of the [LLF Comment Project](https://longlivefeedback.tumblr.com/llfcommentproject), which was created to improve communication between readers and authors. This author invites and appreciates feedback, including:
> 
>   * Short comments
>   * Long comments
>   * Questions
>   * Constructive criticism
>   * “<3” as extra kudos
>   * Reader-reader interaction
> 

> 
> Comments and/or kudos are appreciated, but never obligatory. This author replies to comments, unless signed with /whisper.


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